To the two women at Costa Coffee, Terminal 3, Manchester Airport on Saturday 3rd July around 2pm. 

Both of you are blonde “for the time being rather than naturally blonde” your hair and nails have been done you are flicking through a stack of magazines, sipping lattes and chatting.  Me – hair not done, nails not even thought about, make up in my bag wishfully thought about, magazines a different lifetime ago.  I have a toddler in a buggy and wearing my baby in a sling.  Not chatting I’m directing a toddler in a hushed tone with “you can watch the planes from here.”  Remember me yet? 

OK see if this jogs your memory, toddler leaps from buggy which instantly falls backwards with a bang flicking tray of flapjack & diet coke bottle across Costa.  Yes you and everyone stared.  Yes I was embarrassed and yes I went red.  I looked out the window with my children chatting about the planes, baggage trucks etc. Remember me yet?  How about this I opened my bottle of diet coke forgetting it had hit the deck less than a minute earlier, it exploded and I am now the one in the diet coke soaked white shirt – aha – that’s right the one you two sniggered at. 

Yeah that’s right my humiliation didn’t end there as whilst I was mid mopping up my toddler announced “I need a poo” which took you over the edge from merely sniggering to hysterical laughter as less than 10 minutes from arriving we left.  So child-free ladies with your blonde-for-now hair & manicured nails if one day you are luckily enough to have children of your own, remember me and remember that you sniggered and laughed and remember that I rose above you. 

I am pleased to report that the rest of our flight to Cornwall was event free and we had a great time – more details to follow in a post near this one very soon!