I’m overwhelmed and I’m not getting much of what needs to be done, done.  There I’ve said it.  I know I had a jolly weekend away to Brighton and London and I needed the break.  Oh eM Gee did I need that break and I had a BRILLIANT time in Brighton.  I really needed the break but the truth is my life looks like this right now:To be clear the 20% sleep equates to on average 4.8hrs in any 24 hour time period, I’m typing this as I am printing stuff off for a meeting in Lincoln tomorrow I can hear Baby G not settling for Mr L and when the printer stops I will pack my bag and go and settle her.  I always seem to have a hat on – wife, mother, marketer, social media bod, consultant, confidante friend.  I like being busy I really do – give me 100 things to do and I’ll do 99 or 100 of them, give me three and I’ll do almost certainly none, that’s how I’m built.  I guess that’s what people call drive.  I guess that’s what people call determination.  I guess that’s what people want from me in my working life and what my children need me to do for them. 

There is fall out though.  I am tired.  I am overwhelmed most of the time.  I am frustrated by stuff that slides, stuff that I used to be able to stay on top off when I was a working mother to just Lil’ H, now a self employed working mother with two children I am not quite getting to do a lot of stuff I used to be able to.  It has made me very self critical and super sensitive – one person can be out of order, two people possible but if everyone is out of line then the issue isn’t with other people its with me.  That’s just how I feel at the moment.  Most of the time.  I have stopped seeing people deliberately, its easier not to.  I have cancelled pretty much everything and am not arranging anything over and above playdates and local stuff weekends away etc are all on hold.  Yet I still feel just as busy as before.  What is that all about? 

Anyway print outs are out, Baby G is still up so I am off to grab my 4.8 hours – all help and advice gratefully received!

I have had a brilliant 48 hours – I am shattered – but revitalised by some time without children.  So off to London I went on Friday morning.  First error was forgetting my trousers were in the washer and discovering them wet at 06:15 but that’s what tumble driers are for right?  Well 40 mins later and with damp pockets and waistband, they will dry, I left the house.  Hmm it was about 3 degrees outside and I literally steamed all the way to the station – like some sort of walking smoke machine.  I didn’t care I was walking along with no pushchair, no scooter, no little people, no one else.  My little adventure had begun! 

Wilmslow – Crewe.  Crewe – London Euston.  Euston – Earls Court.  I met up with so many people.  First up the lovely Alaina from Manuka Baby we caught up on sales and marketing plans, walked the show together and bought our kids Trunki head rests.  I had lunch with Sian and Nova.  Then bumped into Emma, another Emma, Karin, Carly, Carol, Mummy Matters and Dandy Do Do. 

Said Hi to the teams at Cosatto, SnoozeShade and Annabel Karmel who were all there too.  My favourite discovery of the show was this beautiful wooden imagination play structure by Rokka – I was seriously very wowed – a boat, a see-saw, a table, a puppet theatre, a kitchen … all in beautiful wood, no plastic *squeals* I’ve never come across anything quite like it.  I HEART ROKKA PLAY!

As the show drew to a close I headed over to my bessie mates to drink fizz eat Bento’s and put my social media marketing world domination plan into action – super exciting – more news soon!  I also ate lots of Chocolate & Love nom nom nom!  On the Saturday I continued South to Brighton for the Twine up… post to follow … for now lets just say it was FANTABULOUS!  Claire x

Back in May I went to The Baby Show at Birmingham NEC – I may have had two children but it was my first and it was ACE! I met up with lots of bloggers and tweeters Lushka, Bumbling Along, Emma & Jon, Glowstars & Urban Vox. Cosatto_Tweets and her crew, the Snoozeshade and Bras4Mums teams were also there. I bought my fab Ice-Cream holder … and I also met … wait for it … Annabel Karmel! Baby G loves her spicy tomatoe rice snacks and her cook books are a regular reference point at Lancaster Towers.

Its back next week and this time down at Earls Court in London, I am going again and combining it was a but of Mummy R & R. I really feel the need to have some time off from my mummy duties. So I am heading to The Baby Show on Friday 22nd October meeting up with Manuka Baby who’s sleeping bags keep Baby G warm & cosy and saying Hi to Team Cosatto. A night of putting the world to rights over a bottle of wine with an old friend, a squeeze of a friends new baby and then I’m Brighton bound for The South Coast #Twineup! BRING IT ON!

So come on who’s with me? At the London Baby Show & #Twineup?

The Baby Show itself is held at Earls Court from Friday 22nd October through to Sunday 24th October 2010 from 9:30 – 17:30 daily tickets can be purchase in advance here from £16.95, they are available on the door but more expensive from £22.00

I am then Brighton bound to meet Bec and the South Coast Mummy Crew to #Twineup in the evening on Saturday 23rd October full details are here

Today has been a bit good and a bit rubbish. Most of my days are like this at the moment it feels. Unfortunately the rubbish bits seem to dominate and I feel like most days are rubbish. I want, no, I need to remind myself there’s good parts in most days. Here’s today:

Had pedicure at pals last night so woke with lovely new toes this morning – good! Had a few too many vino’s woke with headache – rubbish! Miners being rescued – good! Mr L at home, had small “lie in” (does 8:15am qualify?) – good & rubbish!

Went to music classes – good! Baby G had Happy Birthday sang for her – good! Lil H trapped his finger in folding chair – rubbish!

Went to new soft play, Head over Heels – good! Parking – Rubbish! Met up with some lovely friends – good! Saw acquaintance who got right on my mammaries shall we say, never to be friends not even on Facebook – Rubbish! Had a difference of parenting opinion with another mother – rubbish. Left Baby G’s favourite sippy cup at soft play – Rubbish. Realised Mr L had driven off with my car key – rubbish! Then realised my house keys are in the car – RUBBISH! My parents not at home, Mum not answering mobile, Dad not answering his mobile – rubbish! Return to soft play whilst Mr drives back from Birmingham – rubbish!

Extra time in soft play – good. Reunited with Baby G’s sippy cup – good. Got some extra time with a pal I don’t get to hang out with often enough – good! Had tea at Head over Heels – good. Shattered children asleep by 7pm – good. Two blog posts in one day – good.

So why if you ask me “did you have a good day?” would I say “no, it was rubbish!”. What’s that all about?! Let me know your thoughts…

It been a while since I’ve managed to get a post in time for The Gallery, there are many in draft and my head that never got published – bad blogger *slaps own wrists*  This week Tara’s theme  is ‘Your favourite photo. And why.’ An almost impossible task, quite possibly.

At the moment I am cherishing bedtimes with Lil’ H and reading bedtime stories.  It is (usually) a calm, quiet, cuddly part of the day.  I think it is because for me as a child it was a special time and if I was lucky my Daddy would be home on time.  That is why I have chosen this photo of me and my Daddy having bedtime stories.  It much be circa 1976 as that wallpaper came with a new house and didn’t stay for long!  No idea why – huge patterns in orange and brown are just gorgeous, no?!