When your teenage daughter has lost somebody she cares about, she may not know how to deal with her emotions. On top of the general hormonal changes that teenagers face, all of these raw feelings can cause alterations in their mood and behaviour. This may be especially difficult and traumatising for her if the person she has lost died unexpectedly, or due to suicide, as an example. Finding ways that help her to cope with the situation, while still allowing her to process her feelings, can be incredibly important, as well as to set her up for healthy ways of coping throughout life.
Use a Condolence Gift
There are a number of different gifts and trinkets that can be made or purchased to help a person deal with any grief they may be facing. While soft toys might be a good way forward for younger children, your teenage daughter might appreciate something a little more mature. Opting for a silver feather bracelet can be a lovely way to appeal to her sense of style, while giving her something that she can wear to remember and honour the person she has lost. In addition to this, feathers are symbolically seen as a means of communication from the dead, which can help her to feel like she is still close to the person, even if they are no longer physically here.
Discuss the Situation
Remember that, although your teenage daughter is approaching adulthood, she is not currently all grown up. Some teenagers may try to hide their emotions and appear more ‘adult’ about the situation, in hopes of ignoring how they feel or even appearing strong for any younger siblings. Helping your daughter to understand death, and that her feelings are completely normal, can go a long way towards supporting her through her grief. It is also key that, within this, you do not allow her to seek comfort from any negative sources, such as through drinking or smoking, and that the normal house rules remain in place. Not only does this keep a semblance of normality in her life, but can also help to prevent any further traumatic situations from occurring.
While there are many things you can do to help her cope, there might come a time where your daughter is unable to deal with her emotions, or even lashes out in anger at the situation. If this does occur, or she vocalises that she needs support, you may want to consider looking for counselling or other talking therapies to aid her. This can allow her to open up about her grief in a safe environment, as well as better manage any traumas relating to the incident. Children and adults alike can benefit from speaking to outside resources when they have suffered a bereavement.
Helping your teenage daughter to understand and manage her grieving may take an exceptionally long time. By focusing on her, as an individual, you can figure out the best ways to offer support, as well as to allow her to recognise that you are there for her.